Waltzing Mechanics

Chicago's Home for Documentary Theatre

"Pigeonism" -- Amee, Buffalo Grove

Actors Sarah Price and Lance Hill perform this hilarious CTA story in the current run of EL Stories, playing Saturday nights at 11pm through November 17.

Click here ("Pigeonism") to hear the original storyteller – Amee from Buffalo Grove – as she tells Mechanic Eric Loughlin about the conversation she had with a unique evangelist on the Red Line.  The recording’s transcript follows:

AMEE: Okay.  Um, my name’s Amee. ERIC: Okay. AMEE: I’m from, uh, Buffalo Grove. ERIC: Oh, I thought you were going to say Buffalo, New York, and I was gonna get real excited, ‘cause I’m from Buffalo, and I was like, HEY! AMEE: *laughter*  No, n-n-no. ERIC: Okay.  Buffalo Grove.  Sorry.  Okay, go ahead.

AMEE: So I was on the Red Line, um, and I was gi’en-strict-instructions that if I got lost, not to make eye contact with anyone after a certain street.  But I broke the rule, and I made eye contact with this homeless man.  Who at first I thought was harmless, but he came up to me, and he’s like, “Hey!  Hey little girl!”

So I was like, I li-- made eye contact with him, and he’s like, “Can I tell you about-- about my life?  I brought purpose in my life.”  He’s like, “This new religion!  It’s Pigeonism!”  And I was like, “Oh, paganism?”  He’s like, “N-n-n-no.  PIGEONISM.”  And I was like, “Oh.”  He’s like, “We like to-- we like to be one with the pigeons.”

And so he was telling me about his pamphlets, right?  So he had this-- this paper in his hand.  And um, then he opens it up-- it’s just the RedEye.  *laughter*  It’s-- it’s just the RedEye.  But he-- he goes on and on about pigeons.  And um, it’s just us now.  Just the two of us on the-- on the-- in the car, ‘cause everyone’s leaving and I don’t know how to make an exit for it.

ERIC: Right.

AMEE: So he leaves me the RedEye, and he’s like, you know, “This is-- this is-- this is it.  You want purpose?  *clapping along*  This is it.”  He’s like, “What’re you, like fifteen?”  I was like, “No-- no.”  But he was like, *clapping* “This is your purpose, alright?  Pigeons.” Now every time I see a pigeon, I think of that man.

ERIC: Oh, that’s great! AMEE: I totally loved him. ERIC: And it was-- there wasn’t anything wrong with the-- like, he hadn’t mutilated the paper at all-- AMEE: No no!  It was just-- ERIC: --you-know-what-I-mea-- it was just a normal-- AMEE: It was just-- he folded-- I mean, he had done-- he’d done the puzzle. ERIC: Right.  Oh, he’d done the puzzle!  Of course he did the puzzle, right?

The current edition of EL Stories featuring “Pigeonism” runs Saturday late nights through November 17 at the Greenhouse Theater Center.  Advance tickets are available at http://www.greenhousetheater.org/index.php/el-stories